I’ve gone so far from my home, seen the world and I have known so many secrets I wish now I did not know. Cause they have crept into my heart. They have left it cold and dark and bleeding. Bleeding and falling apart
Surrender don’t come natural to me I’d rather fight you for something I don’t really want than to take what you give that I need and I’ve beat my head against so many walls. I’m falling down, I’m falling on my knees
These lyrics from two seperate Rich Mullin songs and this Rembrandt painting communicates where I am at today. After a difficult week where the stress, personal failure and the battles of daily life in this fallen world beat me up real good I now kneel before my Father and receive His loving embrace.
1 comment:
I have been thinking a lot about Father's lately. I am not a father, nor do I know when that will happen. I have had a father, lost a father, interacted with fathers. I have proclaimed a heavenly father. I have heard that it is hard to know the true love of a father until you are one. I guess the same logic can be applied gender neutral.
Everyone gets the chance to be a child, not everyone has the chance to be a father (parent). What if what made a good earthly father had a lot to do with how well you grasped being a child. I watch children who are loved. I watch as chidlren rage against their parents love, admonishments, or whatever is currently offered up by the parent. The thing that strikes me about children, their incredible ability to come back and know they will be loved. Children can come back for a hug 1 minute after a fit of ridiculous rage as if nothing ever happend. There are some incredible brothers highlighted throughout hisorty who could write more about doubt than about faith. These men's stories and lives inspire me,(paraquote) "for I have seen too little of God to be sure and too much not to follow"
It does my heart good to see you failingly return to God and to see God has once again faithfully embraced his child.
At the end of myself I will again find my beggining, as a child I will know the goodness of my father.
In his presence, (even when I would do anything to escape it)
DP~
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